Rough Waters Lead to a Calming Sea Eventually, Right?

Recapping the last few days

I hit a couple bumps in the road Monday and Tuesday. So why not get them out in the open?

So Monday I wasn’t feeling well because here in Ohio we went from winter weather to spring weather back to winter weather in a matter of days. It really hit my sinuses hard and I wasn’t feeling well Monday so I cancelled my psychologist appointment. I’m not happy that I did this at all but I couldn’t really stand the thought of leaving my room with a sinus migraine most of the day. But hey, there’s always next time. Which reminds me, I need to schedule a new appointment. šŸ™‚

I’ve said before that I live with my parents and grandmother which isn’t the most ideal or worst living situation. With that being said, our home sits pretty far back on our lot, causing our driveway to be pretty long and mostly gravel. Well, over the weekend and in to yesterday, we got probably at least 6 inches of snow but no more than 7 or 8 inches. Well as you can imagine where this is going, one of us wound up off the driveway and stuck in the snow with our car. It was a mess and a nightmare but eventually we got the car out. (Thanks AAA) But helping with the car, the snow, and all of that cause me to hurt my back again.

In the last 6 months this is like the 2nd or 3rd time. Which is beyond frustrating to me and I just feel trapped in this cycle of okay, managing and hurt. It doesn’t help that my last two real experiences with chiropractors haven’t exactly been the most positive causing me to want to shy away from that kind of care. Plus the costs of most care, whether it be chiropractic, massage, etc., isn’t exactly cheap. But that’s a different tangent that I don’t need to go off on.

With the back pain, I stayed home from work Tuesday and just stayed in bed pretty much all day trying to nurse the pain away. And it definitely has helped. I’m also trying to be a little more active, working through the pain a bit to try and strengthen my back so this hopefully does not continue to happen and that it doesn’t continue to let me get so down and depressed about it.

Speaking of my depression (and my anxiety because those seem to go hand-in-hand), I tend to take a lot of it out by cleaning, and organizing. Since both have been quite a lot to deal with lately, I’ve been doing a lot of cleaning and a lot of organizing, to the point that I am slowly running out of things to organize and clean. To the point of, I have been organizing my thoughts and note taking methods. I now have a notebook for pretty much everything. I have one for my blog, my Etsy shop, my personal journal at home, my personal journal at work, I have one for work, and I have one for my personal writing. So with this new journal-craze, I have a lot of reshuffling and movements of notes, ideas, and works. I am happy to be re-writing all of this stuff because it really is helping light a new fire into some of my passions that I’ve just been slowly losing interest in.

Though it’s been a rough last couple of days and I’m in a place where it’s difficult to see/focus on the positive, I’m still putting my foot forward and letting the path take me where it may because in the end it’ll eventually lead me forward.

Stay classy and sassy.

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Looking Through Blue Tinted Glasses

An update on me

So ya girl finally got hit with the winter sickness.

And the winter blues.

Which is why two posts were missing from last week.

So I want to be up front and honest with you guys. My mental health has been deteriorating over the past couple of months and I’m doing everything I can to hold on to what I have and build back the rest.

Which is why I want to share what I have been doing to try and help myself. To hopefully help you guys that are having a tough time like I am.

I’ve been reading a lot more, taking the time to myself to read, just to get out of my head for a bit. Books have always been my biggest escape from the world so getting back into that is nice. I recently picked up a bunch of new books (not that I need them, because I don’t, my backlog is HUGE).

I’m also trying to remind myself to get dressed, even if I’m going to be at home all day because looking nice is sometimes half the battle, especially with me because some of my current feelings have to do with the way I look. Plus if I already fought myself to get dressed and ready for the day, I’m more likely to go out and do something, which gets me moving and active which is a good thing. Plus I’m making myself go out. I drag myself out of bed and to work when I don’t want to (which is saying a lot if I don’t want to go to work as I love my job). I’m just trying to keep a normal and consistent schedule. For me, inconsistencies are sometimes an issue for me, especially when it comes to my social anxieties.

Which keeping a normal and consistent schedule also means doing a lot of the same things even when I’m at home. Which is really tough. I don’t always want to work on my blog or my Etsy shop when I get super down but (trying to) stick with these things really do help.

I also am making sure I tell people what’s going on the best that I can and talking to them. Being upfront and honest with a lot of the people in my life makes it easier to go to them or leaves them understanding a bit more why I may cancel or reject an invite to go out and do things. Though the people I surround myself with are amazing and a tremendous help, they can’t do everything, which is why I started seeing a psychologist again. Now this particular psychologist is someone that I saw in the past and both decided together with where he is located geographically and my schedule and a few other things to go our separate ways so I will be venturing in to new territory as I start my journey finding someone new, that I am compatible with. Thankfully he gave me a recommendation but we will have to wait and see.

Seeing someone is a lot of different emotions. I know that I am the first to support and even sometimes push friends and loved ones towards a therapy route to help them but at the same time it’s hard to get to a place where you, yourself is ready to go forward with it. I know I just got to that place.

Just like anything else, I have my good days with this and my bad days. Today is a sort of bad day for me. But all I can do is take it one day at a time and see what tomorrow brings.

Stay classy and sassy.

 

Friday Reflection

My thoughts on the last couple weeks.

Hello guys and welcome back!

So Fridays seem to be one of my most difficult days to publish lately. It’s hard to get myself to just sit down and write and post. The easy fix, I know is to do it ahead of time and just schedule when my posts are going to go up but I’m not quite there yet in the productivity department šŸ˜‰

I think today would be a good day to just reflect on the last couple weeks, especially since I have myself sitting down and writing. For now. šŸ˜›

Today marked the end of my second week in my new job. So was I too soon in saying how happy I was and how much I loved it? Nope. Not at all. I fortunately am working for the same company I was before but in a completely different department. It’s exciting. A very much needed change and a welcomed change of pace. My hours are set for the first time in quite a while. I have weekends off, every single weekend. Now that is something I am trying to get used to! The work is great. I feel like I have a lot of power to make changes and help the company as well as others but at the same time very little power. It’s weird, I know. But that’s the best way I can explain it without saying what I do for a living. Which I won’t, for personal reasons šŸ™‚ But I really enjoy the people I work for and work with. I feel that I’m already fitting in and I’m beyond happy every single day that I leave work. Which is just the best feeling ever. That and the added energy that I have.

Enough about that.

So the other night I had the absolute pleasure of getting together with a lot of the people that I used to work with in Dayton. Now I don’t think we have all ever been in the same place at the same time ever. But like 95% of us finally got together and it was everything I wanted it to be and more. Now these people were my family for 3 years and I am also lucky enough to call them my friends. Being able to catch up with one another and relive the “glory” days was the best. They are some of the most beautiful souls I have had the pleasure of meeting and working both for and with. I would share the amazing picture we took but I want the also respect their privacy of not being plastered on my blog ;P

Overall I just feel a relief in the last couple of weeks. A relief from a lot of the burden I felt that I had been carrying. A relief from the sadness and anxiety I had been struck with. A relief from the stress that had been plaguing me.

I also have been feeling incredibly humbled and blessed with everything I have been able to experience, do, achieve, and have in the last couple weeks as well as in general. It’s funny how when you’re going through it a lot of the time, I know myself is guilty of this always, but we can’t appreciate or understand it. Once it’s passed us by that’s when we realize it wasn’t that bad or it really was greater than we thought, etc. I know that I realized that about the “crap” I had been going through before this life change.

Which is why I think it’s important that I’m reflecting on it.

To put it out there for myself and others, both going through it with me or going through their own. Always reflect and be open and honest about it. You may completely surprise yourself, I know I have.

Stay classy and sassy guys<3

OH HAPPY DAY!

I GOT A NEW JOB! Finally.

Hello there and welcome back!

Okay, so if you’re friends with my on Facebook or follow me on Twitter or anything then you would know.

I GOT A NEW JOB!

It was something that was very very much needed.

I’m day two into my job and I absolutely love it. I feel so fortunate and blessed to been given the opportunity that I have now.

I think it sounds silly but having a mundane desk job makes me so incredibly happy compared to the day-to-day random-ness of a retail-like setting.

The people I work with seem incredibly nice, friendly, supportive and genuine.

And my boss is exactly what I was looking for in a boss.

Guys, I don’t think you understand. I have not been this happen in all facets of my life for a good while.

I’m smiling when I go to work, when I’m at work, and when I leave work. ALL GENUINE.

This is amazing. And life changing.

Y’all don’t understand. I can have a life again. This job is going to, and does, give me so much balance to my life. I don’t have a crazy schedule. I don’t work weekends. I’m off work by 4:30pm. I go in at 8:00am. It’s so so so much.

I forgot what it was honestly like to feel this happy at work again.

Find this. Chase it. You can get it. Never stop until you’re really happy. In all areas of your life.

Stay classy and sassy guys<3

My Reason for Being MIA

Why I’ve Been Gone!

Hey guys, I know I didn’t post at all last week, which is very unlike me. And I have to say I’m really sorry for that. I needed to take some time for myself. I honestly still think I need to take some more time for myself but I’m going to try and balance both posting on here and taking time for myself. We will see how it goes šŸ™‚

Nothing too bad has happened. I just have a feeling of being stuck and trapped where I am at and by a lot of different things. Which makes me feel quite down. I know it’s not a bad thing to be at a standstill and to wait but sometimes it just does feel bad. I’m working through being okay with it while also figuring out what all I really want as well as how to go about getting it. And then making sure I stay as close to that path as I can to ensure my success in all ways and all facets of my life.

But back on the up and up! IĀ finally put together a Google document of all the GameCube games I still need for those of you interested. It can be found here.

I hope you all had a wonderful, safe and magical weekend! Be warriors in all ways, and be kind to one another. And as always stay classy and sassy.

Life Update!

Sharing where I’m at currently in my head and life.

Hello and welcome back to this little corner of the Internet šŸ™‚

So let’s have a little update chat.

Lately I have been spending a lot of time reflecting on everything; my attitude, my weight, my dreams, my goals, my desires, etc. I want to overall be more positive like I feel that I was last year but it’s honestly difficult. It’s much easier to dwell on the bad and not so good and let that all overshadow the good that happened. Though with my positivity some days are better than others but on those good days I can see the difference in everything. Especially those around me. With being able to actually see the change it definitely helps motivate me to see the silver lining and hold on to the good.

I’m also back at the fitness game. Again. But it’s better to be back at it than not at all. I have been working on being more active every day by either going for a walk or riding the exercise bike that I have access to. I’m thinking this time is going to stick because I’m not doing it alone. Mathew and I are doing it together even when we’re apart. We’re holding each other accountable and making sure we both do something every night before we get to do the more fun things, like game. šŸ˜› And I’m trying to make this time more fun. When I’m on the exercise bike, I’m watching an anime and I’m limiting myself to only watching that anime while exercising to draw me to workout more often and longer. So far so good! And having a workout buddy is making a huge difference too. I can’t wait to see how this keeps going.

My reflecting has lead me to set some obtainable personal goals to work towards over the next few years as well. I am aĀ very goal oriented and goal driven person. If I have a goal in front of me, I don’t just want to achieve it, I want to crush it. Setting goals for myself helps remind me I have focus and purpose. It helps me keep my head up and keeps me positive about my future. I want to be successful and the way to success is to set yourself up for success, which is what I am doing. šŸ™‚

Life isn’t always easy and it doesn’t always go my way but I love what I get to do, the people in my life, the rewards, the risks, and myself. I feel very rich every single day in all that I have in my life. The positivity will continue and so will the fitness. Everything else will fall in to play and will happen for a reason.

Stay classy and sassy guys! ā¤ Enjoy your weekend!

Life Update!

Check out what I’ve been up to lately!

Hello all!

So what’s been new with me…

Well first and foremost if you didn’t see my big announcement blog… I opened my Etsy shop! NerdCentral13! Well guys, I SOLD MY FIRST ITEM! I had a lovely lady contact me about making a custom order for her. What was that custom order you ask?! A Lilligant pot. Like the Pokemon! Well I finished her up and shipped her out so take a look!

As you obviously can see, I do take custom orders and I am happy to attempt any and all feats you might request of me!

I also have had the pleasure of seeing some pretty cool places.

First up was Loveland Castle in Loveland, Ohio.

This is where Mathew and I most recently were able to see Mikey Mason perform. Which was amazing. Like always!

Mathew was sweet enough to take us on a little day trip to Louisville for Memorial day, which I picked up A LOT of games if you did not see that, CHECK IT OUT. Don’t worry. I’ll wait… we got to see some amazing views of the city, both fell in love with Louisville. But only at a distance. I will love visiting but do NOT want to move there. It just seemed so empty almost every where we went. It was strange. Sadly I didn’t get any pictures but I did get to enjoy the day with my man and that’s what matters. Some times its better to live in the moment than to document the moment. And it just means we will have to go back just so I can capture some of those magnificent views on camera!

And last but not least, Mathew and I made a trip out to Indy to pick up his mom from the airport and we were able to go a little early and make it to the Indianapolis Motor Speedway to go to the Indianapolis Motor Speedway Museum. This was an amazing experience. Not only did we get to check out the museum BUT there was also a couple events going on that day which meant we got to see some cars out on the track. I was just overwhelmed by everything. It was too cool to watch the cars out on the track! They also had an event with Jaguar and Range Rover where they had some really nice Jags that YOU COULD DRIVE! But sadly we didn’t have enough time nor did we have closed toed shoes to do the event.

Mathew and I have been trying to make sure we have at least one adventure a month and I would say we have done a pretty great job at that so far.

I just can’t say enough how lucky am I to have this life. I love what I get to do and experience and I am forever thankful for that. Especially because of who I get to experience these moments with.

Let’s see where the next month or so takes us.

Stay classy and sassy guys ā¤