Desire (WIP)

I know I said I would get into my time off more in detail but I’ve been finding it difficult to find the right words to articulate what I’m exactly trying to say and have come across. So that is coming. It’s just a work in progress.

However, I’ve been feeling the poetry bug lately. So I wanted to share one that I’m happy with how it’s turned out so far.

I have all these things I want to try,

To accomplish,

To do.

I take steps forward to try.

Small steps.

But that’s when the anxiety creeps in;

“They’ll make fun of you. You’re not good enough. Do you really know how? Do you actually have the time? The drive? Are you skills good enough? Do you have the right stuff?”

These thoughts pull me down.

Quickly snuffing out the fire of any desire I once had.

Not even letting it catch to let it start to blaze within me.

And so I’m left with the same routine.

Doing the same things day in and day out.

What happened to trying? What happened to pushing? What happened to just doing?

What happened to me? When did I change? Where did the person I know go?

 

I hope to find her again.

To let the desire catch and burn, letting nothing stand in it’s way.

#

It’s a little all over the place but the idea is there. I just need to work on getting it more together to flush it out even more. Considering it’s my first poem since I decided to first take my break, I’m proud of it. Sharing what you write is incredibly raw and emotional. It’s hard. But there’s something different about sharing a work in progress. It’s still hard, raw and emotional. But there’s a beauty about it. You get to see that writer in a different way. It’s almost like they show just how human they can really be.

And hey, I’m human.

Stay classy and sassy

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Slipping Back in to Writing, Slowly

Finally working on some writing!

Today I thought I would try and do some writing since it’s been awhile and I’m honestly trying to get back into the groove of normal. I took a look again at a story I abandoned some time ago and wrote some more to it.

In bold is what I already wrote in a previous post and everything not in bold are the new additions to the story. Enjoy!:

There are doctors and nurses whirling around Lucy as she sits in her hospital gown on a hospital gurney with her parents on either side of her in the emergency room. She shakes ever so slightly under her thin gown both from the chill in the hospital to keep germs from multiplying and from her fear of being in hospitals. Lucy didn’t want to come to the hospital, she would much rather be sitting in her room, being alone and pretending she doesn’t exist to the rest of the world. Her parents on the other hand thought differently and carted her off to the emergency room.

Lucy was deeply bothered by the fact that she wasn’t even waiting to be seen in one of the curtained off rooms, rather she was in a hallway, able to see everything coming in and out of the various areas in the emergency room floor. At one point a prison inmate dressed in his prison orange was wheeled by cuffed to the gurney with gun-toting correction officers on either side of the inmate. After Lucy saw a very bloodied woman quickly rushed past by EMT workers she turned to her mother and said, “can’t we go home? Obviously they’re pretty busy with other things. I doubt they’ll even have time to come see me.”

“Lucy, sweetie, it hasn’t be that long. I’m sure they’ll be with us soon,” said Lucy’s mother, Anna.

As Lucy let out a sigh of exasperation a professionally dressed woman with a notepad approached Lucy and her parents, “Lucy? Hi, I’m Dr. Fulson. Do you mind if I talk with you for a couple minutes?”

Lucy looks at both of her parents with confusion but searching for confirmation in their faces. “Go ahead sweet girl, we’ll be right here waiting for you when you come back,” said Lucy’s father, Joe.

“Okay, I guess we can talk,” said Lucy, confusion apparent in her voice.

Dr. Fulson smiled and offered her hand out to help Lucy up off the gurney. “Let’s go find somewhere a little more quiet and private. This hallway isn’t the best for chatting.”

Lucy shrugs off the offer of the helpful hand and hops off the gurney waiting to follow the doctor. Lucy can feel her frustration increasing because no one in explaining anything to her; why she is there, what Dr. Fulson is a doctor of, why she is still hanging out in a hallway, why she is supposed to go with Dr. Fulson and many more questions. Dr. Fulson leads the way, careful to walk at a slow enough pace that Lucy is able to keep up while navigating through all the equipment and through hustle of the emergency room traffic.

~~~

“Are we done now, Dr. Fulson? I would really like to get back to my parents, and I’m tired of answering the same questions rephrased.” said Lucy after what seemed like a 45 minutes of talking.

“Lucy, I wish you would just relax. I’m just trying to understand what’s going on and how we can help you here. But yes, I’m done with the questions, let’s get going,” Dr. Fulson said as she stood up.

“Finally.” Lucy practically jumped up. and followed Dr. Fulson out in to the hall. She was just looking forward to be back with her parents. There was something about the doctor that was giving Lucy a strange feeling, but she shrugged it off with the calm thought that she would soon be back with her mom and dad.

The more long and winding hallways with many different turns the two took, the less Lucy was convinced Dr. Fulson was really taking her back to her parents. The more turns and doorways they went through the less confident Lucy was she could even get back to the office they had talked in, let alone the emergency room.

“Uh, hey Dr. Fulson, I don’t think we’re going the right way,” Lucy said as they went through yet another double door way.

Dr. Fulson just turned around and smiled in response. She quickly turned back around and waved to a passing doctor.

It was amazing how each and every hallway looked exactly the same; no decor or signs giving away where they might be in hospital. “Where are we going then? Where are my parents,” Lucy asked stopping in the middle of the hallway.

Dr. Fulson stopped and turned around slowly to face Lucy. “They’ll meet us soon enough. Don’t worry, Lucy. We’re almost there, anyhow. Come along,” Dr. Fulson said turning back around and continuing down the hall.

Lucy reluctantly followed the doctor, feeling more uneasy with each step she took. The pair took another turn down yet another hall and as they walked halfway down this hall that looked exactly like every other one they went down, Dr. Fulson stopped at a blank looking door on their right. She raised her key card to the panel next to door and heard it beep. Dr. Fulson swung the door open, with what seemed to be a great amount of effort, the door making loud, eerie creaks as it opened. It seemed that this door wasn’t used much. “After you, Lucy,” the doctor said with a very toothy grin.

“Where are we,” Lucy asked, trying to peek her head in to get a look without committing to entering the room.

“This is where we’re meeting your parents. We all need to have a talk, together. Don’t keep them waiting, sweetie.”

Lucy stood still and looked at Dr. Fulson with a lot of confusion and apprehension. “I thought you said they’d be here after us,” Lucy said slowly.

The doctor grasped Lucy’s arm tightly and pulled her through the doorway.

#

Stay classy and sassy

Current Work in Progresses!

Look what I’m making for my shop next!

Remember how I said I wanted to share all of my creative outlets?

Well here we go! I thought I’d share some of my current work in progresses for my Etsy shop!

First up, I’m working on these awesome Star Wars character standees:

IMG_0883 (2)

I’m super happy with how the characters are turning out and love that the logo makes a perfect base for them to stand on. My biggest struggles with this projects has been ironing the base and making sure the tongue of the characters that fit into the base have melted enough while not melting the rest of the character too much. I personally have not been brave enough to attempt the taping method which is why ironing the base was so troublesome for me. Looks like I’m going to have to buck up and try it sooner rather than later!

So this is my next work in progress:

Yup! More perlers! These go along with my GameBoy earbud winders. I’m soon going to be offering GameBoy Advance earbud winders that look like this! These are seriously cool looking in my opinion. I am super excited for these to launch!

Stay tuned for updates these to hit my shop and other work in progresses I find myself getting into and sharing.

Stay classy and sassy!

Rough Writings

Working on a new story. All writing was done in the post. Let’s see what happens!

Hey guys, welcome back! We’re half-way through another week! We can do it! Go us! Yay!

I thought we all needed that 😛

So my writing has been struggling again, and it’s my fault. I just have not been giving myself time to sit down and just write. Plus nothing has been jumping into my head screaming to point that I have to write it down… I rely too heavily on that I’ve found which is not good…

Well I’m going to try to change that today.

I’ve been spending a lot of time going and finding prompts, reading short stories, music and stories in general just to find inspiration. And I found some.

I thought it would be fun to take a prompt, write some words to hopefully make a start of a story completely raw. What you get here is everything I’ve come up with. I may come back (in a different post, of course) and edit what I have, add to it, a combination of the two, who knows. I just want to be raw with my writing because that’s part of the beauty of it and I just like to be this open with you guys. And you guys don’t seem to mind it too much, or do you? 🙂

Anyways.

This is prompt I found online and am going to use: ‘two people who hate each other in real life but are unaware that online they are best friends.’

Here we go:

Agatha hated going to school. Every morning her mother had to argue with Agatha until she finally gave up and went to school. “Aggie, why do you hate going to school so much? Why do we have to do this every single morning,” Agatha’s mom, Susan asked.

“The kids are awful, Mom. Why can’t I just stay home and do online school? It’s just high school, I’ll go to college and even live there if you want! Just please don’t make me keep going,” Agatha said.

“What’s going on at school? Is Violet picking on you again? Do you want me to talk to someone? The principal, you counselor, anyone? You can’t just stop going, sweetie,” Susan said.

“No. Don’t call anyone. I don’t want to talk about it anymore. You just don’t understand. See you after school,” Agatha said as she grabbed her backpack and keys and headed for the door.

Before she could have heard a response from her mother, Agatha was out the door and in her car. She was quick to start it and back out of the driveway so she could get her day started. The sooner the day started the sooner it ended, she thought. Agatha stopped at a house a couple blocks from her own to pick her best friend Trevor up for school. “Hurry up Trev, let’s go,” she yelled out the window.

“Hold on, Aggie. You have to at least let the car come to a complete stop, you know,” Trevor chuckled reaching for the door handle to get in. “I see you couldn’t talk Susan into letting you stay home today, huh?”

“Obviously. Can you get a move on please? I want to hurry up and get today over with,” Agatha growled.

“Dude come on, it’s just school. We only have a couple weeks left until summer and soon you won’t have to worry about Violet and her little clique. Wait. Did something else happen yesterday that I don’t know about?”

Agatha’s face turned red. She tried to hide both her anger and embarrassment about what happened yesterday by using the right turn she was about to take to her advantage but Trevor her face before she had much of a chance to hide it. “No. She’s just a bitch who’s goal in life is to make me as miserable as possible. So just the usual.”

“Agatha! You are lying to me. What happened?”

“Oh hey look, school. We should hurry up and find a parking spot. Homeroom is starting soon, you know.”

“We’re in the same homeroom Aggie. Might as well just tell me now.”

#

Okay so this is all I got for now. For now.

So do I have any direction for this? Yeah. Basically what I want to see happen in this is Violet is the big bad popular bitch in school with her clique. They’re pretty much your stereotypical popular bully kids in high school but Violet plays a pretty popular MMO which is not known to anyone. She ends up unknowingly befriending Agatha who is a total nerd and also plays the MMO. The two don’t know who they are in real life, become closer and closer and then Violet tells Agatha something and she realizes who she is. Don’t know what’s going to be the conclusion quite yet but I do know I want to make it less of a typical popular kid/geek kid story line if that makes any sense. It’s rough though. Nothing is set in stone but then again, nothing ever is when it comes to writing 😛

I’m looking forward to continuing to work on this piece and see where it goes.

Feel free to leave opinions and suggestions for me!

Stay classy and sassy<3